Every once in awhile I listen to what "they" say, but I do so with a grain of salt. Because it makes "they" taste better. No, wait, that's not it...
There are a lot of theories out there about what makes people healthy and happy and prosperous and successful and whatever other good and positive adjective you might come up with.
But really, that's often all that they are - theories. Hypotheses to be tested.
As I have entered into a new relationship - ready or not - I contemplate a lot about what "they" say, and whether, actually, I am ready or not, and if it makes a difference.
Because I'll tell you something. My lady-friend (I actually hate that term, but for some reason, it seems to fit literally (as in style, not actually) in this next sentence...) My lady friend would tell you it doesn't make a difference because we belong together, and that is just that. And I'd agree with her.
So, it doesn't make a difference.
BUT... that doesn't mean it isn't fun to ponder, does it? (And yes, my lady friend might chirp in here that I need to be careful not to borrow trouble.. even if I intend to give it back)
So these "theories"...
Things like being able to be self-sustaining. About it being wrong to "need" someone else. About being a perfectly healthy complete individual before EVER contemplating a relationship.
Yeah, that kinda of bull-hockey (to quote Colonel Potter).
My lady-friend has actually read a considerable amount of my blog, including some of my particularly vulnerable posts. So, she has a pretty good idea of what she's getting into here with me. She's seen some of the baggage that I carry and that I've spent a good deal of this past year and the past three and a half years trying to unload. She knows that my ADD can cripple me at times. She knows that in some objective (ha) standard that I am not "perfect", and yet, she believes that I am perfect for her.
So what do I care what "they" say?
Frankly, for the most part, I don't.
I was thinking, though, while eating my fried eggs for "breakfast" (at 3:30ish PM) about Darwin. And I think one of the reasons that our species has managed to survive, frankly, is that we DO work together. That we are not simply out there as lone wolves trying to do everything ourselves. That the division of labor - whether it was sexist or not - was so that we could do what we needed TOGETHER to thrive and move forward. That it's a lot for each of us to go out, kill the meal, gather the fruits and grains, prepare the meal AND clean up afterwards. That it is easier for us to thrive and to have time to do more than just survive if we do it together.
Because if you'll recall from my past posts, one of my goals this past year is to move beyond just surviving, and move into thriving. And I just don't think it's easy for us to do that alone. Perhaps it is possible. But that's a lot of work for a single person to do all by themselves.
So, even if you don't believe in all the religious crap that God intended us to be in pairs, and such, even just the basic theory of survival suggests, nay, seems to require, that we work together. That we be together.
So, .. if I were to listen, closely, to what "they" say, it seems quite clear that "they" say we should be together. Because it is much easier to do this together, than to do this alone. And I feel blessed to have found someone who wants to do this with me.
Happy New Year, folks! May 2013 be full of blessings and happiness! Let's work together. After all, we are a collective. Resistance is futile. ;) If you've learned nothing this year, as loyal readers, you should have learned that.. ;)