In last night's post, I referenced a parody of Before He Cheats called Before He Speaks, that was a warning from pastor's wives to their husbands about using them for sermon fodder. Central to the core of that is this implicit statement, "Look, dude, I have to live in this community, too. I really don't want everyone coming up to me and talking about the pot roast I burnt the other night, or knowing our intimate private little habits." I don't want to worry or wonder with each conversation I have with you whether it is just between us, or if it is going to be shared with a large group of people on Sunday morning. It is a fair and reasonable request.
It doesn't take a reader of The Bloggess very long to feel tremendous compassion for Victor, and to think that he must have incredible patience. I imagine she takes SOME artistic license when she describes their conversations, but either way, even though she doesn't necessarily try to portray him as a saint, you can see from her writing that he is.
And I do imagine there are conversations between them, probably simply ending with Victor saying, "You're going to put this on your blog, aren't you?" and Jenny replying "You bet sweet Juanita's ass I am".
But even though you've never met the man, you can't help but fall in love a little with him given that he seems to be a truly incredible man.
Now if I wrote you about my girl, I know you would feel the same. She is incredible, sweet, wonderful. She always knows just the right things to say. She gets me. She truly does. It amazes me. She amazes me.
I'd love to write you all about my girl. I'd love to tell you about these moments of silliness I have from time to time, and how wonderfully she responds. I'd love to tell you about how despite the fact that it should, my ADD doesn't daunt her. How kindly she responds, how well she holds up against my friends, how strong and courageous she is. How sweet and loving and warm and affectionate she is. I'd love to share various vignettes that now fill my memory of moments we have shared.
But she is a private person. She protects her digital footprint. She's cautious about what might be posted about her online. And while she does love social media, she nonetheless maintains very clear distinct boundaries about what she shares. Boundaries that we have already blurred together, admittedly. But it is one thing for her to make a clear choice, a deliberated choice, I will post x in y place; and a completely different thing for me to make such a choice for her - particularly without consulting her.
So I found myself lost, sometimes, when it comes to writing new posts, because the things I want to share most, I want to keep between ourselves. I can safely speak generically about how much I love her laugh, but to tell you about what she says that makes me laugh would be too much. And how much do you really want to hear me gloss on and on about how beautiful she is, and how she makes my breath catch? There's only so much of that...
I can say this, though. When someone truly loves you, all she wants is your happiness. Don't settle for anyone who wants less than that. My girl makes me very happy!!